Halloween Fashion Faux Pax OR Pizza de Resistance

I have been reading several blogs lately with people discussing Halloween.  Whether they celebrate, party ideas, costumes, etc.  We have never been huge Halloween people.  We usually attend our church’s Fall Fun Fest and the most exciting part, for me is all the bags of chocolate that go on sale for about $1.88 a bag OR if you hit the stores the day after, for next to nothing.  It really doesn’t matter that the children have enough candy to feed a small country.  A bargain on chocolate is not to be taken lightly!

Anyway, my thoughts have gone back to Football boy’s first Halloween.  It is probably the first time Tigerfan and I even thought much about the day because when we first married we lived in an apartment complex with few children, I taught in a Christian School that did not acknowledge the day and really the day just passed by.  By the time Football boy was born, we had moved to Louisiana and I was teaching at a Catholic school.  One of their biggest fund-raisers was the annual Halloween Carnival and it was a BIG DEAL!  One of the events was a costume contest that the teachers were required to participate in.  I had not dressed up since probably Junior High School and was quite intimidated at the thought of having to find a costume and then be judged in it.  My sister in law, however, came to the rescue.  It seemed a girl she worked with had a big party every year and had tons of costumes.  She said I could borrow one and sent a list of possibilities home with my SIL one day.  I do not even remember the other choices but for some reason I chose to go as a piece of pizza.  It seemed like such a creative, unusual costume at the time.  In hindsight, I can now see the foolishness of choosing such a costume sight unseen, but at the time it seemed like a fun idea.

Carnival day rolled around and my SIL brought home the costume and suddenly a thousand “should haves” entered into my mind.  How do you picture a piece of pizza costume?  I do not know what exactly I expected, but this was not it!  I really do not know what I wore on bottom, probably some “tan” leggings representing crust.  The rest of the costume consisted of an off-white turtleneck with a red sweatshirt over it.  On front of the sweatshirt was a giant piece of pizza.  Think back to the style of cutting out fabric, glueing it onto a shirt and then outlining in glitterpaint.  That, my friends, is what I was wearing.  To top it off, it was accesorized by a lovely necklace strung with little plastic peppers, onions, and right in the center like a pendant was a full size pizza cutter.  I know, you think it couldn’t get worse BUT on my head, I actually wore a real Papa John’s Pizza box with a hole cut out of the bottom so it would sit on my head and an elastic band under my chin so I wouldn’t lose the “crowning” piece!  I knew as soon as I saw this ensemble that it was not the winning costume, but what choice did I have.  I was required to participate and I had no other options.  So I donned the outfit and made my way to my humiliation.  That night, I was met with a lot of strange looks.  I never heard, “Wow, what a great costume!” or, “I never thought to dress like a piece of pizza!”  No, what I heard the most was, “Are you a pizza delivery man?”  Strangely, I was beat out of first, second, or third place.  I think the winning costume was a catwoman costume that was surely rented from the local costume shop.  I still think it is wrong–surely I should have at least received the “willing to completely humiliate herself in front of a large crowd vote”.  Well, my days of dressing up ended with that job.  The following years I think I went as a jeannie (yes, I actually showed my midriff!  Yet another moment I am incredibly proud of!), a doctor, and maybe a baseball player.  As you can see, the appeal of dressing yourself from your available wardrobe finally began to sink in towards the end.  I know longer have the need or the desire to dress up for Halloween.  Truly, I am a little of a humbug about it.  I keep trying to convince my boys that dressing up is way overrated (translated: expensive) and you get just as much candy either way.  I can’t take away their fun, though, so I guess with baby #4 coming we will be adorning ourselves for many more years to come.

We will, however, probably stay away from food related themes.

What about you?  Any costume disasters you would like to share?


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